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2 Dads (my 3yr old stepson calls me daddy, and his Bio. Father is upset) Please Help!
Time: 6:48:14 AM
Remote Name: 188.8.131.52
My wife has 2 children (from different fathers). I love them both to death and treat them as my own. Karina is 7, and Alex Just turned 3.
We've been married a year now and have been together for two. Karina has never met her father (who moved back to Mexico around the time she was born) and sheís really embraced me as Daddy.
About the time her mother and I got married, she started to call me Dad, and hasn't since used my name. Alex however, spends every weekend at his Father's house (though most of the time he's with his grandparents).
The problem arose when Alex started to refer to me as daddy. He hears his sister call us Mom and Dad, so he does the same. When he calls ďDad!Ē from his bedroom, I know heís referring to me and I respond. I have a degree in psychology and understand the importance of the Family dynamic on a child's development. His biological father however doesn't see it that way. He believes that It's wrong to confuse a child about who his father is, and would like me not to allow Alex to call me dad ďA child only has one father, nobody calls two people dad!". Alex has always refereed to him as Dad, and still does. Every Monday, he comes back to us from his fatherís house and says things to me like: "I canít call you daddy, cause my REAL daddy said no!". I don't pressure him to call me dad, but I don't believe it to be so detrimental if he does. I think it would be worse to tell him that he's not allowed to call me Daddy, while his sister does. I don't want Alex to feel excluded from the family.I intend to write his Father a letter (as our conversations didn't turn out so well), and site a few articles and / or Books that could back my position. I hate to see little Alex caught in the middle, and would like to resolve this issue intellectually (I think Ego and Pride are already playing too large a role). My opinion and education alone donít seem sufficient enough to convince his father that Iím right.I am however having serious trouble finding sources that deal with this subject. Does anyone know where I could find articles or books dealing with a similar situation ??? Please E-mail me <agent731@ hotmail.com> Thanks in advance, Brian L. (Last changed: February 26, 2006)
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